Wednesday, March 21, 2007


the good, the bad, the pretty much insane...

the good part is my fingernails are still intact. I'm trying to learn to live life with unbit nails. Still have to perfect the whole "keep 'em" part. Once they get longish, it gets hard to type, and when I have a freak-out moment, I bite away, just like the olden days (i.e. a year ago).

the bad part? I'm having an incredibly immature week. The role of college student is once again upon my shoulders, with the writing of a paper (really, just revising 10 already existent pages and hopefully adding a few to the mix) which is taking an inordinately long amount of time, considering it's the only thing I need to do up here in the mount. I have no good excuses. Unless it is perhaps that I am afraid to finish this stage.

another good part is there are a few dear ones who still remember and care for Sarah here at Central. This has been like balm to the wounds of the still-recovering southern Michigander... Ilene, my gracious host who thinks more highly of me than I do and makes me wonder if she really sees me. She judges my faults a lot more gracefully than I do, and is always reminding me of good things... Colleen, my would-be host and crazy friend who is also wrestling with death in-your-face is one whose company I really miss when away, as she is candid about so many things and appreciative and thoughtful and going to Ghana this fall... Ashley, my English classmate who helped me survive first semester at Central and whose sparkle has always made me glad for her friendship and is moving to Pittsburg... Marina, the Greek from Cyprus, my cultural friend who is crazy about Che, political activism, and beautiful sights, not to mention coffee... and of course the InterVarsity-ers like Lisa who comes running at me full-speed as if it had been years since we'd last parted.

another good part is I've been thinking again of China... weighing my desires and why I ache to be back, if I could really be a decent teacher to those kids who have so much to learn (and teach me too)... honestly I don't know why more young people don't go over there- what an amazing opportunity. I mean really, who doesn't want to see one of the great wonders of the world which can reportedly be seen from outer space!? It's exciting to be able to think of and begin to feel again that I may have the competence for it.

another good part is you're reading ramblings of a caffeinated 23-year old written at 4AM. this shows a quirkiness in you, and I hope you weigh the good parts much more heavily than the bad. Yes, the bad, which is that paper I'm putting off again. But no worries, I have plans to finish it by morn. It is going to be incredibly crappy. But shall I share with you the stats on it?

The paper is 40% of my total grade for that class. I currently have an A in it (I haven't gotten a straight A in two full years at Central, so this is pretty incredible. I think we have to thank the very humane professor on this one, though, because my devotion to the class has been one of loathing, not love) and the final version of the paper is worth 70% of the end paper grade. I have a B going into this. Most of my honest to goodness hard work of this week has been in figuring what my current grade is and the range of possibilities once this paper is done. I should have been a statician (or is it statistician?) I suppose.

If you dear reader have followed the windings of these thoughts, you're more like me than you probably should be.

:-)